Despair is a feeling I think we can all attest to having recently to some degree. I’ve written about my battle with hopelessness in a recent post and it’s still something that I struggle with. Despair is difficult to overcome once you’re in the depths of its well of darkness. In the darkness it’s easy to fixate on those things that have lead you to that point. It’s as if a blindfold has been placed over your eyes but instead of being blinded, you see only the pain, suffering and emptiness.

After months and months of being consumed by despair, I finally had a moment where I saw and felt hope for the first time. It was as if after months of sitting in shadows, the sun finally started to shine, its rays of warm light touching my face and outstretched hands, soaking into my skin, into my heart and soul. I finally could take a deep breath, free of an invincible constraint that had been wrapped around me.

It was the day I received my first dose of the COVID-19 vaccine. I had never been so excited to receive a shot in my life. As a nurse, I give shots all the time but I am always a little apprehensive when I am on the receiving end. As I sat there preparing to feel the pinch and sting of the needle, I felt giddy and honored. Working on a designated COVID-19 unit, I was able to receive the vaccine days after the FDA approved it. Within seconds it was done and I was left with the feeling of hope swelling in my chest.

What a long road it has taken to get here, all the lonely days stuck at home, all the moments my family missed out on, the relationships that have suffered, the constant feelings of fear of getting the virus and spreading it to others. I was finally able to look to the future and see a glimpse of a life free from COVID. I felt like crying and laughing at the same time. I felt so honored that I was able to receive this vaccine that many people spent so much time creating to save us.

Having taken care of patients severely sick with COVID, I knew what the virus truly looked like, and it scared the hell out of me. I go home and wonder is today the day I get it and spread it to my toddler, my young baby and my husband? At work, I am covered in every form of PPE offered to me but I am still terrified. But as a nurse, that’s what we do- no matter the level of fear or danger, we still answer the call and go into the trenches to heal people.

I’ve been asked if I’m scared about the vaccine and the long-term effects… and my answer is no. I am not scared of this amazing thing that scientists have spent countless hours studying and perfecting. I am more scared of COVID and what it’s doing to our world, our nation, our hospitals, and healthcare workers. I am more scared for our schools and children and for my own family who have sacrificed so much this past year in order to stop this thing.

While holding the hand of a patient dying of COVID, he asked me, “Is there any hope? Am I going to make it?” Behind my P100 respirator, goggles and shield, tears filled my eyes because I knew the answer to that question. But instead I comforted him and said, “There is always hope.” I have to believe that there is always a glimmer of hope somewhere out there. Getting that vaccine made me believe more than ever that despair has not completely consumed me. Like Victor Hugo writes in Les Misérables “Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.” Hope is alive, though it may be small. We have to believe that we will overcome and fight for the future that we deserve.

How does hope have anything to do with coconut cream tarts? Well, to be honest, absolutely nothing! But when my thoughts are a mess and I need to think, I bake. And that’s exactly what I did.

These coconut cream mini tarts are made of a coconut shortcrust pastry, filled with a coconut pastry cream and topped with whipped cream and toasted coconut flakes. These are perfectly sized for an individual portion, making it quick and easy to serve. Simply make in advance and serve when you’re ready.

Making the pastry:

For these mini tarts we are using a shortcrust pastry which is the traditional pastry used in tarts and quiches. There are different types of shortcrust pastry and different ways of making it. In this method, we cream together the butter and sugar, add egg yolks and extracts, then gently mix in the flour. I say gently because we don’t want to build up the gluten in the flour. It will cause the pastry to be tough. The word tough while describing pastry = yucky. We are looking for a texture that is firm enough to keep its shape once out of the tin but will also have a slight crumble once we bite into it.

Once the dough is made, it’s important to refrigerate it for about 30 minutes to firm up the butter, making it much easier to line the tart tins. I used 4 inch tart tins that I bought on Amazon. They have a removable bottom, making it easier when it comes time to remove the cooked pastry from the tins. Rub the tins with butter to prevent the pastry from sticking.

Take the pastry dough out of the fridge and knead it a few times on a lightly floured surface to loosen it up. Roll out the pastry until it is about ¼ inch thick and cut in rounds using a round biscuit cutter that is slightly bigger than your tart tins (to allow the pastry to go up the sides and slightly overhang the edges). I used a 4½ inch sized cutter. Gently press it into the edges of the tins. You may be tempted to trim the overhanging edges but resist! It will help the pastry to keep its shape in the tin, instead of shrinking and loosing some definition.

After lining all the tins with the dough, place in refrigerator for another 30 minutes to firm up again.

Since the filling for these tarts is made in a pan on the stove, the pastry requires blind baking, or the process of cooking the empty tart pastry cases. Line the pastry filled tart pans with parchment paper and fill with baking beans or uncooked rice. This will help the pastry keep its shape and not puff up. Bake for 15 minutes then remove the parchment and baking beans. Brush with lightly beaten egg and return to the oven for another 10 minutes, or until a light golden brown. Set aside to cool in the tins. Trim off the edges of the pastry that has overhung the edges using a serrated knife. Remove from the tins.

Making the filling:

The tart is filled with a coconut crème patisserie or pastry cream. We essentially whip eggs with sugar, fold in our flavorings and flour, and then slowly pour in hot milk while constantly whisking. The egg milk mixture is added to the same saucepan used to heat the milk and cooked over medium heat, stirring constantly until thickened. Watch closely because it will thicken rather quickly and can become lumpy. You’ll know it is done when it is very thick and coats the back of a spoon without dripping off. Take off heat and stir in butter. Set aside to cool slightly then spoon into the cooked pastry cases until almost full. Let cool completely before adding the topping.

The tarts are topped with whipped cream and toasted coconut. I like to toast my coconut right after I cook my tart pastry since I have the oven heated already. Place the shredded coconut on a small baking sheet and bake for 3 minutes, stir and then cook for an additional 3-5 minutes or until golden brown. The coconut can burn very quickly so watch closely.

Use a large piping bag fitted with an open star pastry tip (I use Ateco #828). Pipe onto tarts and sprinkle with toasted coconut. Serve tarts chilled. Hope you enjoy!

XO-K

Coconut Cream Mini Tarts

Kayla Bauman

Coconut shortcrust pastry filled with coconut pastry cream and topped with whipped cream and toasted coconut flakes. These delicious mini tarts are perfect for easy serving and look gorgeous! This recipe can easily be made into a 9in tart if you prefer.

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Total Time 3

Course Dessert

Servings 8 Mini tarts

Equipment

8- 4 inch tart tins

Ingredients

Coconut shortcrust pastry:

14 tbsp unsalted butter softened
2 large egg yolks
1 cup powdered sugar sifted
2 tsp coconut extract
¼ tsp salt
2½ cups all purpose flour
1 large egg lightly beaten

Coconut pastry cream filling:

3 cups whole milk
3 large egg yolks
⅔ cup granulated sugar
⅓ cup all purpose flour
⅛ tsp salt
1½ tsp vanilla extract
¼ tsp almond extract
1 cup unsweetened fine shredded coconut
2 tbsp unsalted butter room temperature

Whipped cream topping:

2 cups heavy whipping cream
2 tbsp powdered sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
½ cup sweetened fine shredded coconut

Instructions

For the shortcrust pastry:

Using a handheld mixer or stand mixer, beat butter and sifted powdered sugar for 3 minutes until light and fluffy. Add egg yolks, one at a time, mixing well after each addition. Mix in salt and coconut extract. Add flour and mix until just combined. Don't over mix.
Using your hands, form dough into a ball and slightly flatten to form a disc. Cover with cling wrap and place in refrigerator for 30 minutes.
Grease 8, 4 inch tart pans with butter and place on a baking tray with sides to prevent them from sliding off.
Once dough has chilled and firmed up, knead a few times and roll out the pastry on a lightly floured surface until about ¼ inch thick. Cut the pastry out in rounds using a round biscuit cutter that is slightly bigger than your tart tins (to allow the pastry to go up the sides and slightly overhang the edges). I used a 4½ inch sized cutter. Gently press it into the edges of the tins. Place in refrigerator for another 30 minutes.
Preheat oven to 350°. Line the pastry filled tart pans with parchment paper and fill with baking beans or uncooked rice. Bake for 15 minutes, then remove the parchment and baking beans. Brush with lightly beaten egg and return to the oven for another 10 minutes, or until a light golden brown. Set aside to cool in the tins. Trim off the edges of the pastry that has overhung the tins using a serrated knife.
Remove from tart tins once cooled and set aside.

For the coconut pastry cream:

Heat milk over medium heat in a medium sized sauce pan until just before boiling and small bubbles are forming around the edges.
While milk is heating, in a medium bowl whisk together egg yolks and sugar until pale yellow and fluffy. Add in flour, salt, extracts and shredded coconut and mix until combined. Slowly pour in hot milk, whisking constantly until all the milk is combined.
Add mixture back into empty sauce pan. Cook over medium heat, stiring constantly until mixture has become thick and coats the back of the spoon without dripping off. Remove from heat, add butter and stir until fully mixed in. Pour into a bowl and allow to cool for about 30 minutes at room temperature.
Fill pastry cases with the pastry cream using a spoon, filling until almost to the top. Smooth using the back of the spoon. Set aside until completely cool before adding whipped topping.

For the whipped topping:

Using a stand mixer or hand held mixer, whip heavy whipping cream, powdered sugar and vanilla extract until stiff peaks form. Spoon into a piping bag fitted with a large open star pastry tip (I use Ateco #828). Pipe onto tarts.

For the toasted coconut:

Preheat oven to 350°. Spread shredded coconut onto small baking tray. Place in oven for about 3 minutes, stir and place back in the oven for another 3-5 minutes. Watch very closely because it can easily burn. Coconut is done when it is lightly golden brown. Set aside to cool. Once cool, sprinkle atop the tarts.
Refrigerate tarts until ready to eat. Store in airtight container for up to 3 days.